instead I did it to others my age, I stayed with these thoughts for so long wanting to do it again at 8 years old.
it's my fault I should've known it was wrong. I remember liking it and being happy afterwards. so he touched me, performed oral sex on me. he was very nice and told me we had to play a secret game, that it was normal and everybody does it.
I used to go on 'walks' with this family friend.